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amacker
amacker
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another iPhone rant ...

At 6:27 AM +0000 8/15/08, LeEvil wrote:

Hi everyone!

So, my phone just right-out died, my third replacement in the past 6 mos. I have heard nothing but good things about the iPhone, and as the new model just came out, I figured there would be many older versions on the market. There are on Ebay, but I haven't found one I can afford yet. Considering the HELL I have gone through with all of my other phones, oh, the history of my cell-phone usage... I want nothing now but a phone with a good reputation. Alas, I am unemployed, so I can't really afford much. Any iPhone out there just waiting for a good home for cheap? Figured it couldn't hurt to ask.
" There is no such thing as strong coffee... just weak people."

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From: amacker <galadriel@bitchwick.com>
Subject: Re: Used iPhone for cheap?

Huh???

it's a CRAP phone ... the only reason to have one is that you have the interweb in your pocket. And the fake-GPS triangulating map thingie for the old phone ... otherwise CRAP. (I know the new one has real GPS but mine works fine - at least for where I have ventured thus far...

HERE ARE THE ISSUES:
1. There is no cut and paste *anywhere* within the phone software - even after their big Software Update and even with the NEW iPhone launch. None, zip, nadda
2. Wanna send a pic to someone? nifty .... only it's EMAILED, not multimedia, which means if you have their number, but not their email addy on your iPhone, tough tittie said the kitty when the milk ran dry
3. Someone wants to send YOU a pic? Oh fucking joy! What *you* get is a lovely Text Msg which says this:
Smarmy Motor Pants has sent you a MultiMedia Message! You can pick it up at "IWantMyMultiMediaMessageYouCompleteFucktardWhyAreYouDenyingMe.com" for the next 7 days. After that, we post it in a chainletter bounced through a Siberian porn site with your email attached to it, thus ensuring you will be blocked from every ISP in the known universe.
Use this login:
"HonestlyIWouldRatherImpaleMyselfOnAStapleThenSeeWhatTheyHaveToShowMe"
With this password:
"PleaseDearGodNoNotAnotherPictureOfABabyBeingCuteCuzOnlyTheirParentsDontNoticeThatBrowLineMeansMongoloidOrAtTheLeastNeanderthalButThenTheresRonPerlmanAndHeDidAlrightSoMaybeIShouldLookAtThePicAndStopWhining"
[Don't forget that all of the "O's" are actually Zeroes and all of the "E's" are 3s]

Did I mention that there is no cut and paste in the iPhone????

So you wait til you get to a computer to enter in the impossible-to-remember login and password strings and you get ... a picutre 1 and a half by 1 and a half inches big and you can barely make out wherher it's a sailboat or a high heel, and by now it's been two days and you forget the context and you just shake you head and silently wish an iPhone on the perpetrator so that they can experience the hell of "Multimedia Messaging with Apple" for themselves.

Did we cover the fact that there is no cut and paste in the iPhone????

4. Video ? oh fuck just forget video! Obviously it's not a media or format destined for the future or even discussion in the lunch line at Apple's famed MacroBiotic food line. . . . No, you may NOT capture video on your iPhone and that's final! Go to your room!

If you want to process the video you have already shot (badly, we are sure) into the .m4v files via QuickTime and load them into iTunes, *YOU* can see them, even if you can't send them to anyone else. (Not necessarily a bad thing, if you've seen some of the "home made" videos i've seen...)

Someone has helpfully sent me some iPhone tricks and hacks i can do without voiding my warranty (very important as i have only had my iPhone 6 months and this is my 3rd one) and now i can finally get the photos i take off it without having to email each one separately to myself, which can and has taken hours.

I can also turn any of my mp3 files into a ringtone without jumping through Apple's pathetic system of having to buy the song for a dollar, and then pay ANOTHER dollar to take a snippet of it and use it as a ringtone.

Why rule the world if you only do it badly?

Tags:
Tunez !: "Spanish Fly" by A.K.A.C.O.D.
Comments

Hilarious as always!

I'm so glad that I can live without the interweb in my pocket and don't have to put up with this crap.

Made me smile

Thanks for the fab, bitchin' post. Apple has under-engineered from the get-go (I got reamed by the "logic board goes bad after 2 years" debaucle of 1987).

How do they do it? MARKETING.
They got lucky when their closed-system programming handily blocked out invading virii.

Yes, I'm writing this on an Apple 12" aluminum PowerBook that's slow but sturdy.
A 4 year old refurbished machine I KNOW I paid way too much for.

Ah, well.

Wait for the SmartPhones coming out from Motorola and T-Mobile? I'm betting they'll cut-and-paste.

google android phones?

T-Mobile should have theirs out in a month or two (depending on which rumors you believe), and Android phones can be completely open, or as locked down as a sidekick (still more open than an Iphone frankly).

And the OpenMoko phones are shipping, though they are still barely a phone, they are 100% open.

Verizon will be switching to the replacement for GSM SIMM tech, which means easily run any compatible phone on their network (no more activation required).

T-Mobile is finally rolling out their 3G network as well in October.

The phone world should get a lot more interesting in the next 6 months.

Iphones are still darn cool, and really raise the bar.

And T-Mobile still has their sidekicks, which are a nice internet in your hand device, with cut an paste and a good keyboard.